I would like to kiss a few moments
Make them a part of my skin
Have them live and breathe with me
As I go on with this life, daily
Exposing truth after truth
Of a world that doesn’t care much about my existence.

I want to sleep with these memories on my pillow
Hear their whispers sweet in my ears
But their voice is so feeble
And my eyes don’t open easily.
I am lost in a love that just doesn’t give.
How do we make the unattainable love us?


Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.

I feel

I drink sips of grief

From a porcelain cup

Of tea.

I taste the bitter

Sweet memories

In this black


Coloured candies of

Sweet sugar sweet

Melt on my pink


Salt from a

Pile of white stick

To my wet fingers.

I feel.


Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.


It is a circus

It is a game

You are the trainer

You are the lion with mane

Dancing monkeys and

Blinding colours

Bright lights

Audience full of loud cheers

A joker with sad eyes

An elephant which

Speaks lies

Swinging ropes from

Mammoth tents

A happy dog

Collecting twenty cents.

Who are you

In this flow?

A bit of glimmer

A spark of fake hope?

We are all

Pieces in the game

Come, let’s do our part

Stick to our identity and names

Even if you are lost

You can thank the generous host!


Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.


Each night, silence spreads like wild fire
Across my city of millions
Over the houses and lanes
Sleepy heads and still trains.
A two wheeler cuts a neat line
With its heavy pounding and noise
The rider had a helmet, and a very straight spine.
I look at it from my corner window-
A wonderment at motion that is not mine anymore.

I remember a painting in a book I had once read
Written many years before, about a family and siblings and a lonely island
A dinner with swelling silences.
Bubbles of reality envelope me as I
Think of the boat cutting a neat line across that canvas.

In folds, I hold myself together.
With its heavy pounding and noise,
I feel my pulse in my toes and fingers.
In knots, I sleep noiselessly
By a closed wall and open window.
Open to the possibility of a tomorrow.


Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.


I feel your stare from miles away
A fleeting moment, but one that stayed
In the movement of limbs and rhythm of beats
I thought of you, or maybe I didn’t
But even so, I saw you
And I’ve been thinking of you since.
Maybe I don’t cross your mind at all
Maybe you don’t think of me in the middle of the day or
When you sleep in the night.
Maybe I don’t come in your dreams,
But sometimes, maybe you do in mine.
In the dead of the darkness, before the light is about to break me
Break the sky, I lie awake
Thinking of that fleeting moment.
What do we mean to each other?
You, an unattainable, lost (never possible) lover
The symbol of youth and vile culture.
Me? I am whole in myself
And I keep finding myself, lost in thoughts
Of bricks of infatuations I have laid in my head.
A monster that I have fed
A monster that breeds within.


Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.

A truth, a lie

It’s funny how days

Are not days anymore

But tired hopeless hours

Piled on each other

Faces, are not faces anymore

But expressions of the same

Thought unsaid.

Eyes wander through and to

Colours of humans and one blue

Hands of the dead undead

Deep in my chest

Burst through, branching

Towards the ultimate good.

I have exhausted myself

I don’t feel myself

In this jungle

Of multi-faceted friends

I still, try and try

Because I believe

All actions come back to me

A truth, a lie.


Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.

What am I?

I feel like a full balloon

Floating towards a blue sky

With a tiny tiny hole

Exhaling air more than I take in

I feel like a wet sand castle

I still am

But for how long?

I feel like an unformed cloud

In a clear sky

How will I collect myself from places I belong to?

I feel like an old cassette player

Stuck to a tune that doesn’t sound anymore

Just a dust collecting tool.

I feel like the half milky moon

There, yet not there

In this ever changing night sky.


Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.


Sometimes I feel

The very blood in my body is drying

But other times I feel fine

So fine that I think

And think about all the people in my life.

An odd collection of different facets

Marbled pieces with shiny surfaces.

An arm and inch between me and the world

Faces hover over my neck

Breaths of expectation on my heated skin.

We are going through the myriad of actions

Butterflies on my trembling fingers-

I kiss these pink beings with all my love

Even though sometimes I feel

The very love in me is drying.

But other times I feel fine.


Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.