Privilege

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Miss Flower tells me of her privilege
Showing off her freshly washed and winded leaves.
She has grown taller, is more green now.
A sign of healthy life among the dead outside.
Mumma tried to revive a dry branch by digging it into the same soil as Miss Flower.
The drier the branch became, beauty bestowed itself on Miss Flower.
.
I keep looking at the body of the tree that has fallen.
Its branches have been cut into and stolen.
I remember the time it stood tall and proud, laughing with me each time I looked at it.
Every year, when I went to the Community Pandal during Pujo
To pray to a Durga Maa that kept decreasing in size (Economy is shrinking too)
This tree would make me happy, and blow me a kiss.
An old friend, that the storm took away.
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Miss Flower tells me about the million trees who didn’t survive
Her empathy is praise-worthy.
She is happy doing her bit.
She is liking this new sunshine now that the storm has passed.
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~insight07

This past one week has been awfully difficult. Dealing with the uncertainties of a new job, working from home, and the fear of the pandemic, was not easy in itself. My hometown got exposed to the cyclone of Amphan on 20/05/2020. I have never experienced such a thing. It is a trying time, with the limits of boundaries being tested.

I hope we come out humble and human post this.

(Originally posted on 22 May 2020)
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Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.

Manufactured minds

Manufactured minds-
A productive thought for a dollar each.
I imagine babies hanging mid air
A singing voice floating everywhere.
Flowers pink bloom against imagined walls
People stand in front of imagined gods-
Flames burn and the smoke rises
The smoke enters my cold lungs.
The anatomy of me is science
The anatomy of mind is unexplained-
I am counting pennies for each minute I sell my self.
I imagine fishes smiling at rocks with eyes
A ship sailing down towards the edge
Of an Earth that has lost its shape,
And is indeed flat as a button.
Peeping through one of the four holes,
I look at the sun blazing straight at me
As if hoping for my end
To close this loop of birth and death.
The mystery of existence in a sinking planet-
It’s 9:29 AM, time for my morning meeting.
“Hello, Good morning!
I am good, I have a few updates to make…”
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~insight07
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Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.

Cold Ocean

The world is dissolving
Little by little, water is swelling in
The well that sits empty with me
It is beginning to brim.
The wetness seeps into my clothes
Little by little.
Tips of my hair stick to my skin
My eyes close under the pressure of the waves-
A sea bound by bricks.
I look from beneath the blue to a blue that was once within reach
But now, it has escaped my being.
I am nothing more than a pebble sitting patiently at the end of the ocean,
That dark cold ocean.
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~insight07
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Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.

Existence

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I am not a great poet

But still- I will try.

Stringed and born into this world

We struggle on and on

My fellow humans- I hope you understand

We are not lucky to be born

Existence owes us- for we came into being

And we continue to live.

To all the madness and lessons that life teaches

I am thankful

But I cannot help thinking-

What is the point of this existence?

Why did our blue planet (that is now choking) produce existence?

I am vaguely aware of the science-

I am not a scientist either

But the philosophy- the higher meaning;

It haunts me.

I was not given a choice

I was born into a family

Mad, insane, wild- I call it?

I’ll continue to live

Complicated- full of burdens from all corners

And try to prosper

Financially, mentally, physically

All this while, holding onto the last shreds of sanity

In the cages of my educated and aware mind

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I hope someday I can be a good human.

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~insight07

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Fish

I have been devoured whole
By mouths that open to scream.
Canines push into a tender mind,
Blood rushes in where thoughts are born.
From outside, this house seems almost stationary
A Painting with walls and lost distant eyes.
As you come closer, you see fishes swimming
In round bowls and square windows-
There is a dark ocean in this constraint.
Efforts to swim are a waste;
The waves will devour you whole.
A floating, flowing mass with
The salt of emotions biting my skin.
What have I become?
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~insight07
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Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.

Boarding

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My life brings me to the world.

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Crowds swallow me whole

I am but a morsel of a being

Flavour of anxious confusions

And contemplating hours.

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I almost made eye contact

With a stranger whose heart is

The exact size of mine.

I shared a thought with one

While he was peeking into my mind.

A woman almost slipped her food on my sleeping being

While talking about her ex to her unborn child.

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These stories could be true

They could be false

One truth remains

Crowds are crowds and they are there for a reason

Each person each story with a force behind them

Have come to this point

To stare at you as you

Read your borrowed book in an airport queue

To board an always delayed yet on time flight

To fly home into a reality that at the same time

Is the most convincing illusion

There ever will be.

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~insight07

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State of the World

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Volatile words explode from guns
Volcanoes are yet to erupt.
Orange skies, orange minds
Fires and wells still burn.
Overflowing hospitals with coughs all around
There are crowds still taking form.
Rain falls and falls hard on the ground
Moon takes cover behind the grey clouds.
Air planes carve lines in my vision
A witch hunt; eyes peep into the gates of prison.
Blue screens claw into thoughts,
Wars over boundaries are being fought.
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The world is a breath into my existence
Time dissolves into walls-
The clock ticks on.
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~insight07
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Copyright ©Devika Todi. All rights reserved.

13/09/2020

Hello Bloggers,

How have you been? I hope life isn’t too stressful for you all.

These past few weeks have been rather busy. But I see life settling into a routine that will be around till a vaccine arrives or I am called to Mumbai to start work from office, whichever comes first.

It’s been four months since I started my career with work from home. While it’s been a magnanimous task, getting to know everyone, their working styles, and the work at the same time. But I am glad the most tough part is over.

After developing a bout of fever, we (my sister and I) got tests done. Only to realise that we have not developed antibodies even though a household member had Covid a couple of months back. Now we have entered a mindspace of whatever happens, happens. All that we can do is take precautions (which we are).

Each day when I come across news headlines, I feel like some energy is sucked out of me. Do you ever feel like the world is f**king with us from all sides? Economical, political, familial, environmental disasters. But it is disasters that we have given birth to, I mean it is our civilization. 😛

A month back, my nephew was born. I left home after 5 months to travel. It was a surreal feeling. I remember thinking that if humans can create huge buildings and flyovers from scratch, they can conquer anything. It was an odd feeling, coming face to face with our creations.

In other news, learning Korean has been going good! It’s a little slow, but I am getting into sentence construction and know more words. Although I do see a long path ahead. Are you learning any new languages?

These days, I often find myself thinking of a guy I had liked a few years back. While we were good friends, I haven’t been in touch with him since 10 months. I hope he is well. 🙂